Sunday, January 31, 2010

Grammy opinions

I'm blogging la la!

Stephen Colbert...I love you, but you weren't meant to host the Grammys. (Just like Ricky Gervais wasn't meant to host the Golden Globes.)

Lady Gaga and Elton John surprise duet....loved it!

American Idiot cast and Green Day: LOVVVVVVED it! Very unique.

Beyonce-legit. Covering Alanis? Genius.

Pink. Didn't care much for your "outfit", but loved your performance.

Black Eyed Peas....more than terrible. But I enjoyed the robots.

Lady Antebellum. You are in Taylor Swift's live category. Stick to the radio. You were flat the whole time.

Jamie Foxx: Please stop trying to pull a Michael Jordan. You have no future in a music career. And were you really attempting the "running-man" as a legitimate dance move? Please, no.

The Zac Brown Band: You have mad-crazy guitar skills. That's all.

Taylor Swift: You are awkward. You are always flat. I can't tell if your hair is naturally curly or not and that bothers me. I think you should stick to the studio. And please stop swinging your hair around.

MJ Tribute: Celine: I've missed you. Usher: You are showy. Carrie: I love you. Jennifer: You're legit. Smokey: You're the only one who knew Michael.---Did anyone else think about Free Willy when they showed the killer whale? ----PS No one looks cool in 3D glasses. Even celebrities. (Yesssss)

Bon Jovi and Jennifer Nettles: Fairly good. Jennifer saved you. PS. "Living On A Prayer" has been out of your range for some time now Jon.

Haiti tribute: I've loved Andrea Bocelli for a long time. His voice is insanely clear. Mary J, did you know he is blind? I left like you didn't. And you're standing really close to him. But you were legit nonetheless. (And your body is bangin')

Dave Matthews Band: You are great. Still querky. Still singing out of the side of your mouth. Still doing that weird walking/dancing thing you do while playing.

Maxwell: Who are you? Take your stage fog and lame falsetto and go home.

The people Jeff Bridges introduced: We all know you're lip-syncing.

Dre, Eminem, Lil' Wayne: The best part about you guys was Travis Barker on the drums.

Best of the night: Pink. DMB. Mary J and Bocelli.

In other news:
I'm over the auto-tuning.
I'm soooooooooooooooo annoyed with Taylor Swift. She only writes about fairytales. She can't sing live. She can't harmonize. I think she's still 15. And her hair bothers me (as previously stated.)


jessy burton said...

Agree on all...except lil' wayne, drake, eminem performance. they're good at what they do.

little dalene said...

Was Elton & Gaga supposed to be a surprise? I heard about it on the radio a couple days ago.

Jacquelyn said...

okay mainly agree. Except: BEP always entertains me. Always. And Fergie looked less like a hot mess than usual. Jamie Foxx roxx in my book, but mainly just because I like when people try to give me a good show. Taylor Swift, I do not believe you wrote your songs by yourself, I think someone gave you some sort of MadLibs Country Song type of formula and you filled in the blanks. Also: you do not sound genuine to me at all. DMB, in general not a fan, but when they sing a good song they sing a GOOD song.

I think I may have dreams about Beyonce. And Miley. Hot dog they both looked good without looking like whores. Pink, that outfit was uncalled for.

kristen mcglynn said...

i SO want to see the american idiot musical.

beyonce - too legit. i LOVED it!

taylor swift - i just dont understand. how does she keep winning? she is absolutely terrible live. like not just once...every time!! seriously...someone do something! i can't stand listening to her give one more acceptance speech.

greg said...

Pink's outfit was amazing! I did think it was funny that she covered her ass as she exited the stage. Umm...too late. Best performance of the night though. Eminem is still remarkably gifted. I don't care who you are, if you don't appreciate his gift with words, flow, rhythm, you just don't get hip-hop.

Drake, please go away, forever. Roberta. Dear Buddha, you're too old, honey. I would have preferred to remember my summer loves and your background music 30 years ago than hear you now.

BEP. Nearly as bad as Taylor Swift. Were they just making up new notes? Was that an H? A K minor? Horrible. Robots are only cool when accompanied by The Flaming Lips. Beyonce, I love you, usually. But Alanis? No. Are you dropping lyrics, forgetting lyrics, intentionally pitchy? Careful in those heels. A near complete train wreck. Should have sung Single Ladies.

There was a point, I think it was Ricky Martin or Lionel Richie, when I asked the hhdw, are they raiding the musical cemetery to dredge up these corpses?

And I loved Jeff Beck's band, and I don't care if she was lip syncing. Hot, hot, hot!

Taylor, I actually cringed twice during your duet with Stevie. The sound you made was similar to a sound you'd make if I stuck you in the eye with a fork. My dogs cringed. Auto-tune is the death of music. I do wonder how many voters heard her live and in a moment of cosmic justice threw themselves from an upper balcony for voting for her.

Zac Brown Band. Must you channel Toby Keith's tendency to pander? America the Beautiful? Really? Why not kill a terrorist on stage? Idiotic.

Michael Jackson tribute. Girl with butterfly makes me want to murder a random stranger. Celine. I hate you forever. But it's James Cameron's fault. Carrie, you're the only Idol winner worth a shit. Bless you. Jennifer Hudson, I swear I never once believed those others were better than you. You make me believe you.

Screwed: Lady Gaga, MGMT, the audience. Except those directly below Pink. Mama!

Jenna said...

DMB. duh.

Taylor.. her hair bothers me too. but i heard she's bangin John Mayer.. so... eh? kudos to her.

The Pybs said...

i think you should blog live for every award show this season. you, my friend, are hilarious.

Holli Brewer said...

I, too, enjoyed this immensely. Love that we agree on most everything written... Lets hang out soon!

JJC said...

Greg- Kelli Clarkson is awesome. You just like Carrie b/c she's hotter.

greg said...

JJ, Kelli impressed me immensely, but I'm not seeing a whole lot of staying power. It could be, and I'm not being crass, that she's packed on a ton of weight and people aren't interested in heavy pop stars, especially when they start as pre-packaged, teen poplets. I still think she has a remarkable voice.

JJC said...